Disclaimer: this article is about endings. Not happy endings. Get that smirk off your face.
I have found only one ritual for endings. Sadly, you have to be dead for it, and you have no say in the playlist unless you're exceptionally organized ahead of time.
I've been thinking about this because I left Lumen and have been trying to figure out how to end that chapter properly, or as some would say, uncouple consciously.
Graduations get a ceremony. Japan has Kanreki, a full rebirth ritual. Leaving a job usually gets a last-minute card, some sheet cake, or a video call where somebody's microphone isn't working.
We should probably fix that. Endings deserve better than a muted mic and supermarket frosting.
I chose to leave, and I've known about it for a while. The challenge was that an NDA prevented me from talking about it. Which meant I spent weeks carrying around something I wanted to say to a lot of people and couldn't.
You know who you are, so here you go:
There once was a bald guy named Marco, Who wanted to say a big ciao. But the NDA said, keep it all in your head. So he threw his own parade anyhow.
As mentioned in my non-ai produced limerick, I threw myself a parade. I have a long driveway. Christi threw confetti. My neighbors smile politely at me now. I really did try to get those little blue bits of paper out of their rose bushes, but thorns are thorns, you know?
Lumen gave me a lot. I built and led teams I'm proud of. I was trusted with real problems and given the space to work on them. I spent most of my time surrounded by people who made difficult work worth doing.
Brené Brown says vulnerability involves uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure. If that's true, I am currently batting a thousand.
The fear is simple. When you've had the privilege of doing meaningful work with people you respect, there is no guarantee the next chapter measures up. There are no assurances that the thing you're building will work, that people will care, or that your optimism is justified.
That's the risk. The freedom and courage come from deciding to do it anyway.
So that's where I am today: free and a little afraid.
I will announce what I am doing next here, and hope you all will come along for the ride. Ping me if you are interested in hearing about it.
A note to close. Over the last two years I have grown as a leader and as a human in ways I did not expect. That did not happen by accident. I am marrying a fantastic woman who doesn't let me give up and listens quite patiently while I vent. I also worked with a business coach who helped me get here. Please know your impact will continue well beyond work. Probably until I am old and don't quite remember why I am standing in the spare bedroom or what I was looking for.
If you want to go deeper: Transitions by William Bridges, because every ending is actually a beginning in disguise and he explains why better than anyone. Dare to lead by Brené Brown, because vulnerability is not a weakness and she will make you believe it.